My focus is on suffering, not happiness. “What?!” you might say. “Well, that doesn’t sound appealing.” I realize that, but let me explain. My life changed profoundly once I started bringing my attention to the causes of suffering rather than on a search for happiness.
Now I’m not talking about the external stuff, e.g., my job, my partner, and my annual income—I’m talking about the inside stuff. In other words, I began directing my attention to myself and my reactions rather than on others.
I stopped blaming people for my troubles and started looking at my attitudes, my coping skills (or lack thereof), my daily interactions with people, and my perspective of the world. As a result, my view of people and the world has shifted into a positive one and I experience more peace and serenity.
Things I plan to share in this space.
I plan to write a post at least once a month about my experiences. It is my intention to offer insights, suggestions, tools, and techniques to guide you and encourage you to explore the causes of suffering, acknowledge them, understand them, and work through them—as a way to suffer-less and awaken the happiness, joy, and calm within you.
- Life lessons and mindfulness
- How to navigate calmly through life
- How to process your thoughts and feelings
- Yoga and meditation
- And so much more
I strongly encourage my readers to share their thoughts and add to the conversation. Don’t be shy, leave your comments below.
Jim Reid
Perfect timing for this. Yesterday I was in meditation with this dense constriction of “emotional pain” in my heart area. I observed it for a long time without adding thoughts or situations to it. Later I went out and saw that all my external triggers activated that same constriction. I realized this is part of me not the experience. Today more situations hit me and thoughts were involved to really make for a suffering day and fear of the future. This is hard. I really want to trust that resting in awareness allowing the constriction to be will help more than changing situations. If it doesn’t, I’m going to need a new career and home to live in which is a monumental feat that causes major constriction.
Carl T. Vreeland
Hi Jim,
Thanks for writing. I understand, I still have triggers, and perhaps I always will have them. Meditation helps, but I need more help than just meditation. The physical practice of Yoga and mindful breathing helps tremendously. Surrendering my triggers, negative thoughts, fears, anger, and resentments to a Higher Power is most important for my maintaining any form of sanity. Letting go of the past and the future is freeing and vital to me. Praying helps. Most importantly, I try not to think too much. I know that sounds odd, but it is a helpful habit to develop. All said, a new career and location might be necessary, which is a stressful endeavor for sure. My teacher always said, “Baby steps, Carl, baby steps.” Hang in there, Jim.
All the best, Carl