{Note: This podcast episode was published June 18, 2020. It's still being listened to and has turned into the most downloaded episode to date. I thought I'd post the transcript. Thanks for listening}
Hello Everyone, welcome to “Close to the Bone.” I’m Carl Vreeland.
This is episode #6, entitled, I Am Right and You Are Wrong.
When we say it out loud. When we sincerely express it or even think it. . . well, to be frank, it’s quite arrogant, isn’t it. Yet, most of us think it and genuinely believe it. And so how do we expect to have this “conversation” that everyone is suggesting and desiring? When certainly this attitude closes the door to any conversation. I mean, if we enter into a dialogue knowing that we are right and they are wrong, well, the conversation really ends there before it even starts.
The truth of this quote is apropos: “There are two sides to every argument, until you take one.”1 See, few of us want to have a dialogue, most of us just want to talk, we don’t want to listen. But if we really want to have a dialogue, a “conversation,” we will need to listen. But there is a problem—few of us know how to. In fact, many are unable to listen even if they desired to. This is because listening to someone else’s opinion, especially an opposing one, takes practice and skill. Not easily getting offended by other points of view takes patience and understanding. Again, a skill few seem to have, looking at the current environment.
Now of course, we all think judgmental thoughts, we all have unkind, unloving, and sometimes hateful thoughts in fact. But it’s one thing to think these thoughts and feel them, and it’s quite another to verbalize them and act out on them. Listening takes restraint, which takes practice. Yelling out our opinions is easy and actually lazy. Anyone can do it. But the Path to a peaceful world is a difficult one. It takes great effort. Painfully, as of late, many close friendships have tragically ended over a difference of opinion. When we adamantly feel we are right, when we are coming from an angry and aggressive place, we cause a lot of damage and harm to others and the world. Think about it, even if we truly believe we are right and they are wrong, why is it necessary to express it with aggression and vindictiveness? Why must we speak angrily? Why must we debase another person, group, situation, or institution? This is not the path to peace. No, this behavior is just contributing to the cycle of hate that exists in the world.
If we believe someone is wrong about something, why not listen to them? Why not try to understand their point of view? If their views are hateful, perhaps it is due to ignorance and fear. By demonizing them, discharging hate toward them, we only fuel their opposing views. As they say—we can’t stop hate with hate. Aggression only fuels the fire, only reaffirms our opposition’s stance and puts them on the defensive. We need to let others speak. If there’s any chance of someone turning less hateful, close-minded, and bigoted, if we desire to change someone’s view, we stand a greater chance of doing so by listening to them, and having a heart to heart conversation.
Let’s take a moment here, a moment to get really honest with ourselves. Why do we make the effort to try and change someone’s mind, someone’s viewpoint? Is it because we want the world to be a better place? Is it because we want things as we believe they should be, according
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